"You know we should start a seniors tour like in golf. Over 30 only and sucky players welcomed."
-T.T.Boy
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| Does it Matter? | | | Author: | | | IP: | spider-wXXXX | | Date: | 04/09/01 07:04 | | Game Type: | Starcraft | | Labels: | none | | Report Rating: , # of Ratings: 2, Max: 7, Min: 7
Lifetime Rating for FurtinoMixer: 7.0000 |  |
I mix Furtinos. Yes, many of you have heard me say that, but believe me, you don't know me.
Although I mix Furtinos a lot, I still have a lot of free time, but instead of watching TV like everyone else, I've decided to entertain you all with a "Battle Report".
Actually it's not a BR at all, just an excuse to post many of the quotes and 'anecdotes' if you will over the past few weeks/months, whatever.
Now many of you know who I am, but do me a favor and don't post it in the comments section. I made the name for a reason, and that was to get away from random nhers, and even random -x17ers. However, if you decide to be a badass and post it in the comments section anyways, I will be forced to hire Gary Coleman to come and shit on your doorstep.
Now, onto the fun stuff, but before we get to the fun stuff, I must post a game!
I was in nh, and with no one else around to play a game to BR, I decided I'd make my own game. Now you all know the computers are pretty good trash talkers, give the Jorgumand Brood something to flame you for, and flame they will. Nope, these guys don't fuck around. I'd decided I'd heard enough of their shit for the night, and felt ready to whoop 'em.
I make the game on BB, for you newbies to 4 pooling out there, that's Blood Bath. The computers quickly join the game, and I hit the OK button. Five seconds later the game begins.
 I recieve Zerg, which isn't a surprise since that's what I picked, and after setting my four drones to work, I instantly send my overlord off to scout my first victim.
 I find blue Zerg at the position next to me, and I set my rally point there. I take the drone that brings in the 138th mineral, and order him to wait for two more drones to bring in minerals, then make a spawning pool.
It starts morphing, and I see my very competent computer opponent is merrily making drones while trying to hide from my overlord.
My overlord is now heading down to the bottom left position, where it sees another zerg.
My pool soon finishes, and my pressing the s and z buttons repeatedly for the past 20 seconds pays off as the three larvae quickly turn into zergling eggs.
The lings hatch, and as I morph another egg into a pair of zerglings, the first six scamper off to blue's base. On the way to the main hatchery they pass another one morphing, but I command them to simply target the main one, and then to retreat.
The zerglings sink their claws into the hatchery, and it soon explodes in a mass of blood and whatever else hatcheries are made of.
 I order my zerglings to return to the middle of the map, and soon after to attack the other zerg, who had the audacity to make a spawning pool.
I'll spare you the details, but I basically kicked the computers ass.
Now after this game, both the Fenris brood and the Baelrogs were calling me a hacker, and saying they weren't trying. I decided to settle this once and for all:
The three computers join the game, all chosing Zerg, "Zerg is our worst race, we'll still win." Pfffft, whatever.
I once again do a manly 4 pool, and for the fear of you closing the window and not reading the rest of the BR, I'll just say I won. Yes, I beat 3 comps all by myself, now go add a pair of sunglasses on that oak idol of Fox, then you can worship me.
Now, for everything else =P.
When I was just putting this BR together I found this, which actually kind of scares me =/.
For a complete list of the Zerg Broods, go here, where someone spent way too much free time [;.
Now for the pics:
Kosh, Quad and I made up a clan [SoL] a while ago to make a recruiting BR, but it never happened. Kosh and I still periodically check up to see if anyone's in the clan. Today Aisha happened to be in there, and we had an interesting conversation
Here's another clan somoene and I made up (I forget who =[) and after carefully debating we decided to let yav in.
This was when the Wizz Bot got a bit too friendly =[
This was taken when I was really bored, and needed something to do. We later played a 1v2, which Dag said he's BR =]
This was taken when I was planning to do a BR similar to Scarab's.
This one speaks for itself =/
This one too =]
Kosh is a sad sad man
This was when I was trying to get a CL game, I dunno why I went to Brood war Kor-nc, but anyways, this guy has no friends T.T
I think I was in a bad mood or something when I had this argument, I know who's bot this is, and all you have to do is check it's info. I'm not gonna say who it is though =/.
Heh, jackass cookies
This is also when I was playing CL, the accusation and the SS that goes along with it. This guy isn't really an ass, it just shows what kind of state bnet is in =[
Yes, Garett really is a fag.
Poor Derek
Cas doesn't even know how old his brother is T.T
This is another thing from the Clan BR. It started as a 3v2 on bgh, Quad Nate and I on one team against IStink and someone else. We all did gay strats, and by the end of the game it was pretty obvious IStink had his hack on, as he some how always found Quad's ovies =/. Afterwards Quad and I acted like total newbies, and IStink challenged us to a 1v2. He won with a rush, and it turns out he started with 2000 ore and gas =/
Remember, this is all in fun, I'm not really racist or anything
Now comment you pigfuckers.
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