| #1 Cyan[66416] |
| spider-wq084.proxy.aol.com |
| nice, first comment! gj make more brs. |
| #2 Scarab[66418] |
| ACAF682C.ipt.aol.com |
| telia owns, this is cool |
| #3 Melvinator[66423] |
| proxy3-external.frmt1.sfba.home.com |
| Third!!! Hey I'd read it but it was just a big chunk to me and it hurt my eyes |
| #4 Melvinator[66424] |
| proxy3-external.frmt1.sfba.home.com |
| Hey this was pretty good. Next time get pix and report on a better game |
| #5 Wangsonn[66428] |
| fcs00gsp.gsp.bellsouth.net |
| nice job, the terran fleet in space pic rules |
| #6 Shepherd[66437] |
| res104a-013.rh.rit.edu |
"(I sincerely apologise for the typos I made during this report)"
Hmmmm. . .enufgh sid. . .hlp I am infuctid wuth typos errorz!!!
|
| #7 Shepherd[66438] |
| res104a-013.rh.rit.edu |
Best thing that you can do to improve your report is to proofread! A lot of capitalizing errors, spelling errors (typos) and various things has really affected this battle report.
Enough spamming from here, I'll let other guys to comment. |
| #8 smackemupagus[66441] |
| ith2-b1d.twcny.rr.com |
it needs... i don't know, smaller paragraphs, or pictures... if for nothing else than to break up the flow of the text. your writing style was nice, but would have been more entertaining if it were a better match. also, maybe less details at the end, but more at the beginning when the game was still in doubt?
6
(please take this as constructive critisicm! write more.) |
| #9 Ain Soph[66455] |
| 1Cust74.tnt6.dfw5.da.uu.net |
I've got the demons within
I've got to brush them all away
I feel the demon's rage
I must clean them all away
Yeah, yeah...
Excite to scream them away
Cobwebs in the way
That magic cleaner oh
Shine his smile on me
Yeah, yeah...
I am the demon
Cleaner who saves the day
I get the backwall
And important they'll always stay
Yeah, yeah...
If only one thing that you know
Imposters from the show
They'll try to trick you into
Normal treatment
Oh don't you listen to them say
Shush them all away
I am the demon cleaner
Madman so
I am the freedom cleaner
Standing naked here to say
I'm the only way...
|
| #10 GouZuLu[66460] |
| 195.249.56.3 |
Ain Soph - Go away - it is not the right forum for this crap.
On the report : Too much text, Didn't read it, sorry.
GouZuLu |
| #11 BUU[66465] |
| 207.80.13.5 |
| kekek it rox! err.. wait, what am i talking about? i forgot.. oops. oh umm yeah.. pictures>>you! |
| #12 Robert Frazer[66478] |
| frazers.demon.co.uk |
Just in case anyone's wondering, the 'Borg' that was referred to in the joke section is a haunter of BW GBR-1 who talks nothing but rubbish and generally makes a total arse of himself constantly.
I admit that there could have been more pictures though, and I will rectify that in the next part of 'From Her majesty's Starcraft players'.
-Robert Frazer-
"What are you saying, that I can dodge bullets? |
| #13 SCV~007[66670] |
| t2o57p45.telia.com |
I liked it. Make the next one, preferrably within 10 minutes or so. Nice to see a report with some actual grammar in it :P
(Im growing tired of that poem or whatever it is ain_soph.)
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