| #1 willwinforfood[97567] |
| ool-18b81465.dyn.optonline.net |
first in the working version..have you heard of the preview buttow?
-wwff |
| #2 BADKITTY![97569] |
| ss09.ny.us.ibm.com |
| 2nd! You = bad monkey |
| #3 skimoose[97573] |
| h0050da0aa372.ne.mediaone.net |
| Yah, preview button is key. Other than that, text didnt flow, game was hard to follow, and spelling mistakes were plentiful. Other than that, it was pretty funny. I would have to guess English is a second language to you? |
| #4 ..DiSTuRBeD[97574] |
| burlingcache.lisco.net |
| Don't give away the ending in the title. It just detracts from the report imo. |
| #5 Drintr[97577] |
| user201.pop2.cwia.com |
The report was a bit hard to follow. I would suggest getting others to proof read your reports before submissions. I think that if you work at it, you can create some great battle reports. For now, I think this report deserves a 4. Good luck on your next br.
Peace and Love,
Drintr |
| #6 Syndrome_Zed[97579] |
| P124-Dell.Stanford.EDU |
1) I agree w/#5 - don't give away the ending beforehand
2) I hope skimoose is right and English is your second language, because it was pretty bad
3) Too much cutesy language - "bringing the water to put out the fire" was barely amusing the first time, it did not need to be repeated.
4) It was a pretty crappy game to have to report on - Toss was in charge from the beginning, and was never particularly threatened.
5) I assume when you say that Terran saw the Citadel of Adun, you meant that he expected Dark Temps? You said zealots, and I just couldn't figure out why to expect zealots from the citadel :)
I gotta go with Drintr. 4. |
| #7 Gyro[97580] |
| 66.indianapolis-03-04rs.in.dial-access.att.net |
Pryde is Korean, so english is his second language.
Maybe the player expected leg upgrades early from the citadel :)
4 is what it deserves pryde :( |
| #8 Kepow'Ob[97582] |
| ch5blm.bellglobal.com |
I didn't like the way the pictures were done, mind you, you did have some. Some had a faded out a lot when it got close to the border, some a little, and some not at all, all with-in the same collage.
Apart from that I'll just be repeating what the others said. |
| #9 Mistears[97583] |
| sc-66-27-186-128.socal.rr.com |
| Dont always center your pics. Try to align text to the side of the pics. Although this condenses the report greatly and requires far more text(or less pics), itis nicer to look at. |
| #10 Khas[97587] |
| ool-18ba98a3.dyn.optonline.net |
| there was a background? |
| #11 [SM]Strega~F[97588] |
| proxy1.senet.com.au |
Umm, background = not there.
Definitely not English as instead of ' (ie. Jeb's supply depot) it was ¡ and _ (but up top).
Game was one-sided = no thx.
4 or 5
Strega |
#12  [97594] |
| on-tor-blr-a58-02-432.look.ca |
i didnt read it,but it looked like there were lots of pics. next time, only include pics that are important
long dl=bad for modem users :p |
| #13 pines0ul[97596] |
| h24-70-206-245.gv.shawcable.net |
| If you're going to buttonize pictures, at least buttonize with consistency |
| #14 Ling-erie[97597] |
| host213-123-24-206.btinternet.com |
Your title...
how the hell do u lose a victory?
|
| #15 Ling-erie[97598] |
| host213-123-24-206.btinternet.com |
having now read it:
Try to stick with one or 2 border types for all your pictures.
don't put in pictures of random un-identifyable explosions, and PROOF READ IT.
Otherwise it looked excellent, easy to erad, good HTML use, just PLEASE preview and proof-read your work b4 u sibmit, as i'm sure u would have wanted to remove some of those pictures if u saw the in the report alongside the better ones. They stood out like an EXTREMELY sore thumb.
u'll get a 6 prolly, but a 7 was a little care and attention away. |
| #16 BADKITTY![97604] |
| ss02.co.us.ibm.com |
Try not to bring home grand union, either... It always leeds to horrible misunderstandings, and sometimes death. A better way of going about it, would be to buy your groceries, and just bring them home... Leave the store where it is. Your family will apreciate it, I can guarantee that.
Another thing to remember when posting on BR.com, is not to actually go to "BR.com" but "battlereports.com". I cannot stress this enough... So I wont try.
Finally, most important of all, Don't wear plad. |
| #17 BADKITTY![97608] |
| 32.97.182.21 |
"Gladly Hsyhehe has a comsat at his expo and sweeps his main and when Deez saw the blue sparkles..."
What's frightening about this sentance, is that it isn't gramatically incorrect... Most americans that I know would immediately point out that "Gladly ..." doesn't work the way you used it. In reality, it's not gramatically incorrect (see definition #2), but it's not a commonly accepted way of getting the point you wanted across... So I wouldn't use it if I were you, it disrupts flow, and causes people to wonder about their fading sanity.
Also, regardless of weather it's O.K. to use gladly the way you did, you would want to have a comma after Gladly, and another one before "and sweeps"... But that's something most people will be able to disregard.
|
| #18 BADKITTY![97609] |
| 32.97.182.21 |
Remember, this one sentance is an example of the countless similar sentances within the report... I'm tryin to help with a point, rather than specifically pointingout one sentance that could be improved.
The people who sayd it had a good flow obviously didn't see a problem with this though, so maybe it's not as important as I think it is.
glad1 (gld)
adj. glad·der, glad·dest
1.
a.Experiencing or exhibiting joy and pleasure.
b.Appreciative: was glad of the fire's warmth.
2.Providing joy and pleasure: a glad occasion.
3.Very willing; pleased: glad to help.
4.Bright and cheerful: a glad May morning.
5.Archaic. Having a naturally cheerful disposition.
|
#19  [97627] |
| ct91955-a.richmnd1.in.home.com |
Not much to add here. I think the rest of the commenters have pretty well covered all the bases. 5.
Dref |
| #20 PrYdE+[97661] |
| ch7smc.bellglobal.com |
umm guys just to tell u to clear sum things up... the English was bad I understand... but the background I dunno how to change the background colour I tried but I didn't succeed and I didn't have enuf time to PROOF READ IT... or I was just too lazy ...
and mind u that this is my very first Battle Report so... expect another one soon but with better graphics and using all the tips from these comments I greatly appreciate them... thank you... |
| #21 ground-LOBP-[97695] |
| syr-24-169-180-86.twcny.rr.com |
| !@#$!@#!@#!@#!@!@#!@#!@ HOW DID MY REPORT GET A 5 YU8934FO3J34LG;83H3LGU7I34IYUH omg i'm pissed... sorry, I'm hung up on it, flam eme |
| #22 ground-LOBP-[97696] |
| syr-24-169-180-86.twcny.rr.com |
| I give this a 3 btw |
| #23 GoZuLu[97697] |
| 195.249.56.3 |
"That very much balanced the game while Deez had 5 bases with about 50 peons, Hsyhehe had 3 bases with about 10 peons..."
1:5 in income !!! Thats not balanced. Not even if it was a TvZ game.
Didn't read the the complete report, since English is my 3th langride, languede, language, langruige, what ever ...
GoZuLu - TheOldDane |
#24  [97698] |
| papaya.fgm.com |
Hi... good first effort, and I realize that English is not your first language, but for your next report, get someone that is a native English speaker to proofread for the oddball incongruities (like the Gladly thing above). It's obvious though, that you put some time into this report, and I hope you're next one's even better.
As for pictures, half of them didn't work for me. A good rule of thumb for modifying pictures, whether in Photoshop, PSP, or whatever, is that you should try not to enlarge a pic beyond its actual size unless your resampler is really good. Photoshop usually does a good job but other programs tend to result in bad looking pictures. Also, find a balance between picture quality and quantity. Here, you used lots of pictures that were compressed to be really grainy. In the same amount of download time, you could have had a few really good pictures.
Cheers. |
| #25 )(V)(aster[97957] |
| spider-tm034.proxy.aol.com |
| To the "Gladly" thing... It actually is grammatically incorrect, Considering Gladly is an adverb and there is, In fact, No verb to adjectify. Not to mention the sentence is a run-on with or without use of comma's. Not a bad report though... If you follow a majority of the constructive comments above youll make a good reporter. |
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