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"He may have used cheese on me in the beginning, but I would use CONDIMENTS on his shiny protoss ass."
-YourRoleModel




#1 the-nut[143163]
ool-182e1a3b.dyn.optonline.net
FIRST!
nice sabo!
u kno mine is coming soon! ^)^
this is awesome
7.5 - 8.0
^_^




#2 Triped[143164]
cf2.utc.com
actually, this report sucks
#3 Some_God[143165]
ool-18b8c59f.dyn.optonline.net
3rd ... this looks nice =D

Cheers,
~SG~


#4 EldritchEvil[143166]
nr11-216-196-189-46.fuse.net
Whoo.

9

#5 The0ne[143167]
65.174.25.28
kind of weird. . .
The zealots came and killed the hydras and more hydras came and killed carriers etc., etc.
#6 Sabotage[143168]
pool-68-161-122-19.ny325.east.verizon.net
wtf 2

#7 LameJoker[143170]
a5811.bates.edu
Nice job, but it could have been so much more. This is a really great game, and it seems like if you had just spent a little bit more time on it, this report could have been spectacular.

You should try reading your reports out loud to yourself, so you can pick up the grammatical errors that spellcheck misses.

The biggest booboo in my opinion is that you need MUCH more color in your writing. It has to be engaging. I read the whole thing because it was a pretty close game and there were nice pictures, but it's your job to captivate your reader with writing and humor. I don't really know how you can improve on this, other than to read reports by classic BRers and also to read books.



#8 Triped[143171]
cf2.utc.com
in short: it sucks
#9 L J (continued)[143172]
a5811.bates.edu
Unfortunately, I'm not really justified in giving tips, cuz I can't get up the gumption to learn HTML and actually do a report.

I'll take this, though. ;)

#10 LameJoker[143173]
a5811.bates.edu
Triped please don't put words in my mouth. thanks.
#11 the-nut[143174]
ool-182e1a3b.dyn.optonline.net
lol! my quote in the begining from my first br!
#12 Casper...[143175]
CPE0010b50f508e-CM00e06f16610c.cpe.net.cable.rogers.com
br's are good because it's so easy to hide just how slow and pathetically played a game actually was.
#13 Triped[143176]
cf2.utc.com
so you weren't saying that it sucks? because everything you said supports my thesis that it sucks
#14 Sabotage[143177]
user-2ivea8f.dialup.mindspring.com
omg triped
It doesn't suck k?
It doesn't have to be the best br ever k? I know it isn't the best stuff, but stop going against me! We need more BRs at this site and you don't have to hate one that isn't perfect.
so uh,
i get the point. stop saying the same thing.



#15 Sabotage[143178]
user-2ivea8f.dialup.mindspring.com
But then again, don't stop the advice
#16 Triped[143179]
cf2.utc.com
actually it does suck

here are the ways in which it sucks:

bad writing

bad pictures

bad html

bad player colors





#17 Funkii[143180]
216.250.177.84
yeah it definitely sucks.

You forgot bad writer and bad players too (holy shit red was the 2nd worst player I've ever seen).

Blue was the worst of course, did you even READ the report people?
#18 the-nut[143181]
ool-182e1a3b.dyn.optonline.net
-___-
#19 Sabotage[143182]
user-2iveb9e.dialup.mindspring.com
God this isn't fair
Now that triped said it sucks everyone is against me?
#20 bang my mother[143183]
spider-tf074.proxy.aol.com
it was ok
#21 Sabotage[143184]
user-2ivecl9.dialup.mindspring.com
And also, I don't believe my pictures sucked and html and player colors? how can player colors be bad?
well thank you #20..
#22 el_sux0r[143185]
0-1pool52-182.nas39.philadelphia1.pa.us.da.qwest.net
Not bad. Your pics are uber compared to mine.

One thing you might want to watch is the grammar; otherwise, not bad at all.

Hey, Sabo, I've been thinking about something ever since I saw your Photoshop skills . . . want to do a joint report or two at some point?
#23 Sabotage[143186]
user-uive8lt.dsl.mindspring.com
hmm well i dunno
Why not?
But I have one more lone report to do before this.
#24 endersshadow[143187]
ool-182d2de6.dyn.optonline.net
Well I orignally typed a long drawn out repsonse to this report, but seeing as how it was deleted I guess I'll just start over -.-; Your writing sucks. Plain and simple.

"Then he produced from mid left, and cleaned lower left. He then moved on to lower mid."

Your reports definitely have the potential to get 8-9's instead of 7's if you simply typed as if you didn't talk in ebonics.

#25 el_sux0r[143188]
0-1pool52-182.nas39.philadelphia1.pa.us.da.qwest.net
Good luck with it.

Send email to nomineATjesus.zzn.com (replace AT accordingly) when you feel up to a joint BR. Your pics, my writing ;)
#26 Sabotage[143189]
user-uive8lt.dsl.mindspring.com
yeh I didn't spend enough time on writing i admit..
#27 endersshadow[143190]
ool-182d2de6.dyn.optonline.net
(continued)

Go back and read the dedicatee's (?) reports and note how he weaves humor and information in his reports, overall making them easy and fun to read instead of a chore.

A battlereport is supposed to take in the reader with facts, but also humor him/her so they enjoy the experience and want more. You basically presented here a replay with some words to accompany. Keep trying, your pictures are already great, now just get somebody else to proofread your work, as what sounds good to you may not make as much sense to them.
#28 sabotage[143191]
user-uive8lt.dsl.mindspring.com
uh who's reports?
#29 endersshadow[143192]
ool-182d2de6.dyn.optonline.net
Hmm, looks bad that I'm giving you advice on writing when the last sentence of my previous post was a massive run-on ;).

LameJoker, HTML really isn't that difficult to learn. The neccesary HTML required to put out an average battlereport is actually very limited. If you can remember simple things like bold (<B>) tags then you shouldn't have much difficulty. I learned it in about 2-3 hours, then started/quit 2 reports since battlereports.com thinks I'm a hacker -.- I actually found that you spend more time editing pictures then typing the code/writing it.
#30 el_sux0r[143193]
0-1pool52-182.nas39.philadelphia1.pa.us.da.qwest.net
He's talking about CB's reports.
#31 LurkerBurger7[143194]
ool-182e1a3b.dyn.optonline.net
gj sabo
I really liked the writing in say the the first third of the report.
"...and the zergs were turned into ketchup." hehe fun stuff.
But then you started to show some lack of energy; your grammar deproving and your 'fun stuff' was discontinued.
But still, overall great, I'd give it a 7...maybe an 8

:)
#32 Sabotage[143197]
user-uive8lt.dsl.mindspring.com
omg it was really long game and stuff and it got so boring. its hard dammit.
#33 el_sux0r[143198]
0-1pool52-182.nas39.philadelphia1.pa.us.da.qwest.net
Yes, but I'm offering to do it for you ;)
#34 All-FeAr[143199]
165.154.24.190
ah yes , the flames from the armchair athelete , it was good picture wise , and pretty much the same as the last text wise , yes most of the above people are correct this was a good game heck it wasnt slow , but the core to all reports is text, and thats what u need , heh gj anyways , the skimmers will love it and the cb dedications , bah easy 1 extra rating lol .
#35 BiGRooStER[143200]
pcp02936415pcs.dalect01.va.comcast.net
maaan sabotage you should play me.. and then make a BR out of it.. because im a studly stud
#36 Swiffel[143201]
ip68-14-142-34.ri.ri.cox.net
Sabotage, I didn't read it, but just skimmed. The pictures look nice, but from what I've heard, your writing sucks. Don't worry though, I know how hard it is to write stuff that keeps people interesting, (you wouldn't even want to read my br -.-) and the best advice to improve it would be to simply write a lot, and you'll get the feel of it. For everybody who said this br sucks, fuck em, I don't see their battlereports anywhere.
#37 Minatour[143202]
kenn-dial-1-199.amerion.net
LOL i thought all-feared would win :( buut he lost ^$^$ curse that dam zerg always comming back..anyways this report was fun to read
#38 Convider[143204]
Toronto-HSE-ppp3660508.sympatico.ca
very nice pics, but the writing was too mechanical IMO...
7.54752
#39 the-nut[143205]
ool-182e1a3b.dyn.optonline.net
after reading all these comments........I STILL THINK THIS REPORT IS GOOD...
#40 the-nut[143206]
ool-182e1a3b.dyn.optonline.net
40th!
#41 Triped[143207]
dsc08-chc-il-2-146.rasserver.net
after mr. nut's endorsement, i'm even more certain that this still sucks

now i know it can be easy to get bent out of shape cause you arent good at this, but try to be rational here

after all, maybe your next one won't suck, wouldn't that be nice?

so yeah just keep that positive attitude in mind and you'll do well for yourself
#42 miNATOUR[143208]
kenn-dial-1-64.amerion.net
i like cheese if u dont then ur cool but onnayluc ie lcike i liked dis report alLOT
#43 Smeagol[143210]
049.a.001.hob.iprimus.net.au
it was a bit painful to read as everyone said but it seemed like a pretty bloody good game to me with lots of comebacks by both players
and triped at least sabotage and the nut werent playing in the
report ^_^
gj sabo i reckon u will get a 7-8
#44 Mr.Puddles[143211]
216.49.243-DSL-187.ckt.net
I just looked at the pictures, since my starcraft game is off and I probably forgot all the units. They were pretty. Mini-maps give you a 5 points. Pictures of scarabs give you 10 points. There you have it, my rating for this report is 14.9 because of bad text content (like I know I'm just going with what the other commentors said). Need... More...
#45 kinslayer[143212]
HSE-Ottawa-ppp163976.sympatico.ca
don't mind triped, thats just him.

nice report, keep improving.
#46 the-nut[143214]
ool-182e1a3b.dyn.optonline.net
AHEm Triped.... it doesnt suck...
#47 Triped[143215]
dsc04-chc-il-3-205.rasserver.net
Damn you Kinslayer....bleh I need more places to troll. =[

This wasn't good though, seriously.
#48 BlueRibbon[143221]
65.167.44.105
Writing isn't that great, but the pictures are pretty good. Don't mind "Triped" (nice handle btw ;o) as it wasn't "suck" as he put it. -_-

7-7.5
#49 Sabotage[143225]
user-uive9fm.dsl.mindspring.com
:) there at least i still have some fans.
Well, I tried to make it interesting with the subtitles, if anyone noticed, but thank you for positiveness. My next report will be coming out some time in the future!

All-fear thanks for the game, again.
#50 Sabotage[143227]
user-uive9fm.dsl.mindspring.com
Lol i remeber, when i first made my the_fag report, CB told me i could be so much more if i just didn't have the stupid pics and improved my horrble writing. Im glad he told me that, cuz I believe Im much better at this stuff now.
Thanks, cb
#51 sabotage[143230]
user-uive9fm.dsl.mindspring.com
OKay i read it over. Yeah there were some dry spots, but the writing wasn't too horrible... in my opinion
#52 LameJoker[143278]
pool-129-44-13-229.alb.east.verizon.net
sabo it was fine, you just need to improve in some areas. Don't get discouraged just because some ppl who could never do any better said you sucked.
#53 GeneralPatton[143279]
spider-ta084.proxy.aol.com
eh, it was ok. I've seen worse for sure, but the report didn't grab me like it could have. I read 3 paragraphs and then stopped reading entirely and looked at pictures. Alot of your writing was covered by pics (atleast on my computer), and your writing was bland. Pics were pretty good, but it can't cover up the fact that the game was between two really bad players. Like other people have said, I suggest you read the report guides by Zerg~Ling and CB. Your reports have alot of potential, and if you can improve upon them, you'll get an easy 8-9 score.
7
#54 Triped[143293]
dsc08-chc-il-4-117.rasserver.net
I could write a better BR than everyone who's commented in this thread combined.
#55 kinslayer[143302]
HSE-Ottawa-ppp163976.sympatico.ca
I seriously doubt that triped :P

If I was only motivated enough to actually do a report.
#56 Triped[143316]
1Cust174.tnt1.rockford2.il.da.uu.net
same
#57 Sabotage[143329]
user-2ive788.dialup.mindspring.com
Oic, triped had been hating me for some time now -_-
#58 Triped[143332]
dsc09-chc-il-6-42.rasserver.net
i hate the sin, not the sinner
#59 Sabotage[143333]
user-2ive788.dialup.mindspring.com
Sin? thank you for your nice words!
#60 LurkerBurger7[143338]
ool-182e1a3b.dyn.optonline.net
wheres the raters?
#61 Sabotage[143339]
user-2ive788.dialup.mindspring.com
yeh, :*( raters took time to rate spam a one, but not to rate me lol
#62 JakobderLudner[143355]
24-205-51-132.gln-eres.charterpipeline.net
Writing could use some work. Seems you rushed this out and didn't proofread it at all. Don't get me wrong here, I've liked your last reports but this one is a little frustrating to read because it sounds like little effort was put into reading it over. The flow is kinda choppy and more color could be used. Kinda disappointing from one of my favorite battlereporters. Oh well. Better luck next time.

I'd probably give it a 6.0-6.5
#63 JakobderLudner[143357]
24-205-51-132.gln-eres.charterpipeline.net
By color, I mean color in grammar and writing. Your pictures were pretty good, but not exactly, you know, Breeze or Testosterone quality (as you probably already knew).
#64 the-nut[143363]
ool-182e1a3b.dyn.optonline.net
OH NO! ITS NOT geTTing ratED!!
#65 Sabotage[143364]
pool-68-161-122-19.ny325.east.verizon.net
omg its lowered to a six!
I don't think I could suffer that again -_-
#66 Sabotage[143365]
pool-68-161-122-19.ny325.east.verizon.net
maybe its underated :)
#67 Triped[143385]
dsc08-chc-il-5-215.rasserver.net
no chance :)
#68 Sabotage[143395]
pool-68-161-122-19.ny325.east.verizon.net
h4x! when will it get rating! (may 14 morning)
#69 Redemption6[143408]
65-78-29-178.c3-0.lex-ubr3.sbo-lex.ma.cable.rcn.com
I think this deserved an 8.5. As someone pointed out earlier, it was a great report, but could've been much more. The biggest lack in this report is the writing quality. There were a few problems that you had:

- Tense problems. Usually battlereports are told in past tense; unless you're doing a report in which there are "announcers" and they announce what's going on while the game is playing. You seemed to mix in present with the past, and it was a little strange at times.
- Humor/Emotion. You didn't have much color in your writing, it was basically just explaining this, explaining that. While you did describe the battles well, you didn't really do much else.
- Plot holes. You have a few of them. For example, I never figured out how blue got so many mutalisks, because it seemed just a few paragraphs ago when red was in control with the reavers. I also don't see how blue is able to defeat the "doom fleet."
#70 Redemption6[143409]
65-78-29-178.c3-0.lex-ubr3.sbo-lex.ma.cable.rcn.com
(continued...)

- I know your game was a comeback game, but don't make it so obvious to the reader. For example you titled one of your subtitles "the comeback" and the "turn of the tide." The reader can figure out that it's a comeback without you having to hint so. (for example your whole first 5 paragraphs was about red raping blue with corsairs/reavers

It was a good report, but could've been better. The pics were great though; and ignore number 2. He's just an asshole.
#71 Triped[143411]
cf2.utc.com
I love how you think something should get an 8.5 when it has three of the biggest problems to ever plague reporters.
#72 Sabotage[143412]
pool-68-161-122-19.ny325.east.verizon.net
We will see what i get...
But damn Im sick of seeing NR next to teh report :(
#73 livingexception[143426]
pcp03797940pcs.wilmsc01.tn.comcast.net
I agree with much of the above, so I won't repeat it. I actually think your picture selection was pretty nice (good scarab shots, shots of exploding zerg) and I also liked the ice blue picture borders. As to the writing, one thing I think that would really help is not to use the same sentence structure so much. As in you very often started your sentences with the subject, immediately followed by the verb. Try starting with some prepositional phrases or using compound sentences to spice things up a bit. Do that, and integrate some more colorful language, and you should be good to go.

le
#74 All-feaR[143439]
165.154.24.244
gogogo raters , dont worry sabo more goodies were this game came from , and i told u ppl like sexy scarabs ogoggogo
#75 Redemption6[143449]
65-78-29-178.c3-0.lex-ubr3.sbo-lex.ma.cable.rcn.com
Triped, I love how you brag about your battlereporting skill, yet never make battlereports. People who don't make battlereports don't deserve to talk, so shut the fuck up and never talk again.
#76 Redemption6[143450]
65-78-29-178.c3-0.lex-ubr3.sbo-lex.ma.cable.rcn.com
I personally think effort is enough to get you at least the first few points, and pics are enough to give you the next few. Writing was the only huge problem in this report, and that shouldn't count much more than 3 points anyhow.
#77 Triped[143453]
cf2.utc.com
Oftentimes women will ask me why I don't take off my shirt for them more often. I usually play down my muscular physique (which drives them wild), but the real reason is because my body practically glows the unmistakeable hue of reporter gold! Every fiber of my being, from my impressive biceps to my winning eyes, tells the world that I CAN WRITE!
#78 Sabotage[143454]
pool-68-161-122-19.ny325.east.verizon.net
phj33r i know, i need rating :)
#79 LurkerBurger7[143457]
ool-182e1a3b.dyn.optonline.net
AHAHAHAHAAHHAAAAAAAAAAA
#80 mick[143480]
1Cust63.tnt13.bne1.da.uu.net
this site needs more rapers
#81 mick[143481]
1Cust63.tnt13.bne1.da.uu.net
*rapers
#82 LurkerBurger7[143482]
ool-182e1a3b.dyn.optonline.net
lol
#83 LurkerBurger7[143483]
ool-182e1a3b.dyn.optonline.net
*lol
#84 Sabotage[143487]
pool-68-161-122-19.ny325.east.verizon.net
wow! still no rating! this has been up since friday and now its wednsday!
Raters cmooon
#85 Triped[143492]
cf2.utc.com
they just don't want to break the news to you that this sucks :)
#86 Sabotage[143495]
pool-68-161-122-19.ny325.east.verizon.net
Shutup triped you've been proven wrong
u versus 40 or so people...
#87 Triped[143497]
cf2.utc.com
too bad only stupid people have disagreed with me
#88 the-nut[143505]
ool-182e1a3b.dyn.optonline.net
HEYYYYYYYYYYYY, i'm not stupid u squid
#89 the-nut[143506]
ool-182e1a3b.dyn.optonline.net
90th!
#90 Sabotage[143508]
pool-68-161-122-19.ny325.east.verizon.net
dork. lol
#91 Triped[143515]
dsc07-chc-il-1-191.rasserver.net
lol shut up
#92 Sabotage :([143517]
pool-68-161-122-19.ny325.east.verizon.net
itsliek , thursday and still no rating and i sent this last fridayyy3
#93 Sabotage[143572]
pool-68-161-122-19.ny325.east.verizon.net
ahh this thing has been up for a week, no rating, ones before me get ratings ;/ someone rate plz.
#94 livingexception[143579]
pcp03797940pcs.wilmsc01.tn.comcast.net
Sabotage, the sad fact is some reports never do get rated. This'll be on the front page for like another couple weeks at least; however, don't be surprised if that NR stays with it forever.

If I had to venture an guess, I would say this would be rated 6-7. If I were you, I'd stop waiting on pins and needles and get to work finding another game (should you be so inclined as to do another one) instead of waiting for a rating that may never come.

le
#95 Sabotage[143582]
pool-68-161-122-19.ny325.east.verizon.net
LE Im already working on my next report, i just wanna see my rating
#96 BlueRibbon[143696]
65.167.44.26
Goddamnit, triped. Come here a flame a few more times so I can get fucking comment 100 -_-
#97 asdf[143705]
sdn-ap-005caburbP0426.dialsprint.net
this sucked fat cock. your writing is so fucking terrible. go die and never write again.
#98 mick[143707]
1Cust74.tnt13.bne1.da.uu.net
who want's 100?
#99 triped[143711]
cf2.utc.com
u
#100 Sabotage[143738]
pool-68-161-107-106.ny325.east.verizon.net
GJ asdf ur gay.
Alright im glad it was rated :)
Wow nobody posted much recently, 1 week with 1 time thing
Im gonna be away for awhile on summber vacation so my next report will be much later...
Cyas
#101 all-fear[143833]
165.154.24.147
sabo im emailing u a gg
#102 koalasnatcher[144751]
sms1.stmikes.k12.nm.us
Hey, sab.
i put a couple comments on the newbs3 game. check those out. and allfear, nice try man, u had good ideas.i would have done the same. i can play toss and zerg, learning terran, but pretty good w/ other 2 races. SAB, REALLY MAN, CHECK OUT MY COMMENTS ABOUT THE NEWBS3 GAME, THERES ALSO SOME OTHER KEWL STUFF.



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