.
Now let me introduce you to my friend Joel. Take it away Joel.
Joel: Thanks Frank, this game should get underway soon, but while we¡¦re waiting, lets introduce the judges.
Big Booming Announcer Voice: First, to judge the macro of each player, we have, Germany. This decision was based on the fact that after their entire country and army was devastated in WWI, they macroed like a whore and soon had an even bigger army ready to fight in a short 40 years.
Our second judge, to rate surprise attacks, is from Japan. This decision was made because of a vicious attack on Pearl Harbor that caught the Americans completely by surprise.
The next judge, in charge of defense, the French. The French set up a spectacular defense after WWI to protect against another German invasion, it was called the marginal line. A series of bunkers and pillboxes constructed on the France/Germany border. Sadly, they could only turn around 180 degrees, and once the Germans got past via the Ardens Forest (where non were built) the country soon fell under Nazi rule.
Next up, to score frontal assaults, it¡¦s the U.S.A. Because as we all know, nobody assaults like America assaults.
And our fourth and final judge, to score each player micro, is all the way from Canada. A Canadian judge was selected for this honor due to the fact that several BR.commers are Canadian, and if some of those are raters, I might get a higher score for making Canada a judge. (If you can think of anything else to judge them on, go to hell)
Joel: Well that¡¦s all of the judges, hopefully they will score our competitors in a just manner.
Frank: And that will occur soon, because here come the players. Yes, I can see Mr. X coming out from backstage, and he¡¦s being escorted by four SCVs. Yes it looks like the Terran army will be faithfully serving him in this skirmish.
Joel: And I believe I see MandyMooreOwnz arriving here too. It seems he brought with him some probes, signifying he will fight using the Protoss.
Frank: Both players take their seats in the commander modules, Mr. X starts at 9 o¡¦clock, and MMO begins at 12 o¡¦clock and start the match
Joel: Peon clones occur and they begin pumping peons. You know Frank, I hope to see some excellent tactics today, coupled with strategy to make it an exciting game.
Frank: Yes, me too. And¡K¡Khold on a sec. We have just received each players build orders. Here we go with the build orders up to the first offensive move.
Mr. X-Depot at ramp on 8/10, scouting with the same SCV that finished the depot, Rax at ramp on 12/15, Gas on 12/14 showing early tech, Depot at ramp on 12/15 (finishes wall in), Factory on 17/19, Machine shop added on the factory, Starport on 20/26, control tower added on.
MMO-Pylon on 8/9, Scout with the probe that started the pylon, Gate on 14/15, Pylon on 15/16, Gas on 13/15, Nexus at natural on 15/21, Cyber Core on 16/18, and another Gate on 16/21.
Joel: And during those build orders, some interesting things happened, one of them being why MMO¡¦s nexus came rather late. He had plenty of minerals for it right after the 1st gate warped in. But Mr. X¡¦s scouting SCV decided to be a bitch and stand right where the nexus would have gone. Thus denying the expo until the SCV was chased off by mad particle beam wielding probes.
Frank: Yes Joel, a completely gosu maneuver by Mr. X. And fans, incase you were wondering what that first offensive move was. Well it was MMO¡¦s first military unit, a dragoon, destroying Mr. X¡¦s scouting SCV (I don¡¦t know if that counts as an offensive move, but I¡¦m tired of typing build orders).
Joel: That machine shop of Mr. X¡¦s is spinning. Let me check, yes its siege mode for the deadly siege tanks. And a maynard transfer by MMO gets the expo up and running very quickly.
Frank: While you¡¦ve been observing are Terran contestant, I¡¦ve been looking at the Protoss camp. And I see something that would make Mr. X¡¦s stomach turn if he saw it.
Joel: Well Frank, are you gonna keep us in suspense or tell the people what it is
Frank: Ok, ok, have some patience Joel. It¡¦s a Robotics Facility.
Joel: Ohhhhhhhhh, looks like a reaver drop to me.
Frank: Well it could be Joel. But I¡¦ve seen builds like this before, he could be going for early observers.
Joel: What!?!?!? Early observers!?!? (multiple punctuation owns your bones) why would he go for something stupid like that.
Frank: Possibly for better recon. He only did scout out a little bit of Mr. X¡¦s base after all. Or possibly to defend himself from a cloaked wraith attack.
Joel: I guess so. But I still think a reaver drop is much better.
Frank: Well your entitled to your opinions Joel. Just like our players are entitled to their different strategies. And speaking of which, the control tower to Mr. X¡¦s starport has finished and he wastes no time in making a dropship.
Joel: There ya go. You know how good drops are don¡¦t you Mr. X. All it takes is one good drop and BAM!! The enemies looking for all their nice little peons. Thus giving you an edge.
Frank: Uhhhhhhhh, yeah, whatever Joel. It doesn¡¦t look like it will matter though, because that early expansion of MMO is gathering him massive amounts of resources, and with 2 Nexus¡¦s (Nexi??) he should have no problem rebuilding his probe population in no time.
Joel: Looks like we¡¦ll soon find out, won¡¦t we Frank?
Frank: We sure will as the dropship picks up the tanks and heads over towards MMO. And to make matters worse, MMO has moved his only defending three goons down to below his ramp.
Joel: This could get messy. But it looks like the dropship is going to the expansion, not the main base
Frank: Yes, and the tanks siege up, and start laying waste to MMO¡¦s expansion from the cliff.
Joel: But what¡¦s this? A shuttle picks two goons and drops them right on the sieged tanks. It¡¦s all over for those poor souls
Frank: Not yet Joel, Mr. X saw that shuttle coming and he quickly unsieged his tanks and is moving the towards the minerals in MMO¡¦s main
Joel: Yeah some decent micro from the terran commander, lets see, the micro gets a 5 from the Canadian judge, and a 7 from the Japanese judge for a great sneak attack.
Frank: But it¡¦s not over yet as the tanks drop in MMO¡¦s minerals at his main. This attack however is quickly quelled by two goons that destroy the dropship and the surviving tank.
Joel: Well, it looks like that attack is over and there will be a brief lull in the action. This is used by Mr. X to expand to his natural
Frank: You know Joel, I believe the kids call that cliff attack a ¡§Turbo Newbie¡¨ but I¡¦m not sure. You know, just can¡¦t always keep up with the crazy slang these days.
Joel: Fushizel
Frank: Huh????
Joel: Uhhh, never mind.
Frank: Thanks to two Nexi (Nexus¡¦s???) MMO is able to rebuild his economy in no time. And I believe I am correct as he also builds an observatory for those early observers. Remember that Joel??
Joel: Yeah, whatever. But lets check with the German judge to get a score on the macro that was used to rapidly rebuild some probes. Hmmmmm, a 4+-, not sure I agree with that, but then again, I¡¦m not a judge.
Frank: No you¡¦re not Joel. And it seems Mr. X won¡¦t be dropping any tanks soon as two goons are now patrolling the cliff above the Protoss natural.
Joel: Not only that, but these are goons that have been fitted with the recently discovered singularity charge that allows them to shoot farther.
Frank: Ah, that certainly will deter some drops. In a hurry to use some minerals and make some needed tech, Mr. X builds an academy, e bay, comsat, and lifts off his rax for an unknown reason.
Joel: Well it¡¦s heading for his enemies base, some recon perhaps??
Frank: Well the chance of a rax rush working at this time in the game is a little over pi percent
Joel: 3.141592634589% Frank??
Frank: ?????
Joel: Great vocab there Frank, when did ya learn to say ?????, college?
Frank: Listen you little bastard, I¡¦ve been working in this business for 30 years, your just some bum scraped off the street that the network felt sorry for.
Joel: You wanna piece of me, huh DO YA OLD MAN!!
Amoeba_Boy: (me, remember) Uhhhhhhh, guys, your on the air, live.
Frank: Uhhhhhh, yeah, we¡¦ll settle this backstage you little punk.
Joel: Fine with me you crapbag.
Frank: Well, lets see what¡¦s going on down at the temple.
Joel: Last we left off, MMO had fought off a devastating drop from his opponent.
Frank: But MMO¡¦s not out of the woods yet as another dropship picks up two tanks and heads for it¡¦s target.
Joel: Looks like Mr. X is building two more factories, and MMO is building another gateway and two observers. Right now each player has three buildings that pump their primarily used units.
Frank: That¡¦ll help their macro a lot. But something that will hurt MMO¡¦s macro is that dropship filled to the brink with doom.
Joel: Whatever Frank, the dropship this time drops it¡¦s cargo on the right side of the protoss main. Several probes are vaporized before defending goons move right next to the tanks and destroy them both.
Frank: And that sneak attack got a 6 this time, not as good as the last one, probably because it didn¡¦t take advantage of terrain.
Joel: Maybe, but not only have some probes been destroyed but the others had to flee, disrupting the resource gathering.
Frank: Exactly, and that floating rax of Mr. X¡¦s has landed in front of his expo and is protecting some tanks right now.
Joel: The two finished factories have added machine shops and another dropship is being made.
Frank: Not good for MMO, if he can¡¦t get some offense going then he¡¦ll be finished soon.
Joel: Well here comes some of that offense, seven goons and a shuttle move to Mr. X¡¦s mineral only expansion site and wait. But it doesn¡¦t look like this will have much success, Mr. X has strategically placed tanks guarding his expo. There¡¦s one on the high ground cliff, one behind a rax, and one opposite the one behind the rax.
Frank: But you overlooked something newbie, if you look closer you can see one of MMO¡¦s observers hovering above the defense. This attack could be more successful then you think. Yes, he come the mechanical, ball spinning, robotic, heavily shielded, brightly colored, anti-air
Spiders of the protoss army (<----Maximum amout of adjectives I could cram into that sentence)
Joel: Here¡¦s the attack, the goons charge and, wait, I thought I counted seven attacking? But know there¡¦s only 5, where are the other two?
Frank: MMO has brilliantly loaded two goons into his shuttle and proceeds to drop them on the high ground tank, effectively taking it out. A great technique, and unexpected.
Joel: The rest of the force isn¡¦t faring to badly either as they take out the other tanks. Looks like some reinforcing tanks come out and destroy the two goons on high ground, their next targets being the ones below.
Frank: Mr. X flees his SCV¡¦s from the expansion and through high ground tanks manages to take out the remaining attackers.
Joel: The American judge gives that an 8 for landing the goons on the high ground tank, Canada gives a 3 to MMO for not moving his attacking goons close enough to the tanks to avoid being hit and a 5 to Mr. X for micro.
Frank: You forgot that the French judge gave the terrans a 6 for their defense, should have had more tanks.
Joel: Well, more tanks won¡¦t be a problem as another factory is added to the terran¡¦s main.
Frank: But the protoss says whatever you can do I can do better and starts making two more gateways and a forge.
Joel: Shaping up to a good game isn¡¦t it Frank.
Frank: Yup.
Joel: You know it¡¦s to say a bit more.
Frank: I only have to say what I want to say, don¡¦t tell me what to do rookie.
Joel: You won¡¦t be able to say anything after I knock your teeth out windbag.
Amoeba_Boy: (me again, hehe) Guys, guys, settle down, no fighting in the announcers booth, you might damage the expansive equipment.
Frank: I¡¦m gonna damage his face.
Joel: What, you gonna throw your dentures at me gramps?
Amoeba_Boy: GUYS, KNOCK IT OFF, OR YOU¡¨LL BE FIRED.
Frank: Uhhhhhhh, of course, the game, watch the game.
Joel: Two dropships carry three tanks, and it looks to be to MMO¡¦s main mineral line. Boy Mr. X sure does love his drops and surprise attacks.
Frank: He sure does, he also expands to the 6 o¡¦clock main, while MMO looks to make his own drop by picking up two goons, and he adds another two forges for fast upgrades.
Joel: Yeah, upgrades could be a deciding factor considering how Mr. X doesn¡¦t even have an armory but MMO has three forges.
Frank: Looks like both contestants are altering their strategy a bit. A Citadel of Adun usually means zealots, and here some come, right out of the gateways. And vultures begin popping out of the red factories, with upgrades in protoss ground weapons, armor, shields, and vulture speed all beginning.
Joel: That drop of three tanks lands on the cliff overlooking the 12 o¡¦clock natural. They quickly dispose of the two goons up there and are soon attacked by two more goons dropped on him.
Frank: Through some excellent micro of moving near death tanks into and out of dropships, Mr. X is able to win with only one tank lost. Yet the shuttle returns and this time drops a goon and some unexpected zeals.
Joel: And these zeals cause the tanks to retreat. Lets see¡K¡K the micro judge gives an impressive score of eight to the tank commander for moving the wounded tanks into the dropships and then back out again. And a score of 1 to the protoss commander because he preformed no micro at all. And the sneak attack judge gives a score of 5 for the drop because he dropped in the same place he dropped the first time he dropped (lots of drop).
Frank: Another factory at Mr. X¡¦s latest expo evens him up with his opponent.
Joel: But he continues on his building making spree by making two more factories and two armories.
Frank: Mr. X definitely holds an advantage over MMO now, beating him in expansions, production buildings, and is not very far behind in upgrades either.
Joel: But I don¡¦t think that will matter soon, as I can see the beginning of a templar archives being warped in along with the researching of those zealot fast walkie things.
Frank: Well Joel, while the high templar may be mighty, I don¡¦t think its powers will be able to hold off a metal build.
Joel: Are you crazy Frank?? The templar rule over all.
Frank: Listen, there¡¦s no way MMO will be able to make enough HT to fend off the waves of vultures, tanks, and goliaths that are about to flood his main.
Joel: You underestimate the power of a psionic storm.
Frank: And you underestimate the power of my fist.
Joel: You¡¦re so weak, you punching me would feel like a pillow.
Frank: A pillow filled with bars of lead.
Joel: Bring it old timer.
Amoeba_Boy: (I love my cameos) That¡¦s it, BUTCH, GET¡¦EM.
Frank and Joel: Huh, who¡¦s Butch.
Butch: BUTC H MAD
Frank and Joel: O DEAR LORD!!
Butch: BUTCH SMASH SCRAWNY NECKS
Amoeba_Boy: BUTCH, HOLD IT. Ok there, boys, you fight while in that booth one more time, and Butch will bring his tree trunk sized arms down on your heads.
Frank and Joel: You got it, sir, Mr. Amoeba_Boy, sir.
Amoeba_Boy: Goooooooooooddd, now I believe you have a battle to announce.
Frank: Ye, yea, yeah, yeah, ya, yeah. The battle, of course (It¡¦s hard to type stuttering)
Joel: Well, Frank, we¡¦ll just have to see if HT can stand up to metal.
Frank: Ooooo, Mr. X got sloppy and lead his returning dropships from his tank drop over two goons. The worst part is he lost one of the dropships, the one that happened to be carrying both the tanks.
Joel: Tough loss, but I don¡¦t think he cares because soon he¡¦ll have seven factories pumping out more tanks. And he¡¦s building a science facility, probably for some SV¡¦s.
Frank: That¡¦ll spell the end for MMO¡¦s observers.
Joel: The metal user makes another factory at his 6 o¡¦clock expo, and moves out a force of three tanks and several vultures to protect that very same expo.
Frank: But an observer sees the force move out. The vultures plants a minefield near the temple and moves the bikes towards the expansion. They don¡¦t get very far though as they are engaged by four goons and some zeals.
Joel: The zeals are easily picked off by the vultures ranged weapons, but they only do five damage against the larger goons. The vultures start dropping faster than a drunken prom queens panties to the dragoons. The bikers retreat to the safety of their tanks that start to blow up the spider into blue swishy stuff that looks like the cross between mouthwash and a milkshake (Ewwwwwwwww). A few more mouthless troops move to reinforce but they get caught in the minefield and three tanks make it to the expansion.
Frank: Drunken prom queens panties??? Mouthwash milkshake??? What the hell are you talking about.
Joel: I¡¦d like to see you do better you..
Butch: UUGGHHHH.
Joel: Nevermind.
Frank: MMO really needs to take some action now, he needs to expand and build some more gateways to level the playing field a bit.
Joel: Yeah, we¡¦ll see if he does that.
Frank: Mr. X takes his min. only and protects it with some mines and vultures. This raising his expo count to three.
Joel: It looks like MMO is preparing to mount a strike on the terran main. He¡¦s collecting troops near them, to the left of the temple. These troops include mostly goons, some zeals, and a few DT. I guess the archives won¡¦t be for HT after all.
Frank: Perhaps not, but I don¡¦t think those DT will make much of a difference. A science facility has already been made and it won¡¦t take long to have a SV hovering over the troops. Only about as long as it will for Mr. X to figure out there are DT on the playing field.
Joel: Here comes the assault, the goons go in and a team of vultures races out and lays some mines. Yet they have no effect as the goons are destroying both the mines and vultures very quickly.
Frank: Meanwhile, a shuttle loaded with three DT¡¦s takes advantage out the turretless base drops the assassins in.
Joel: The min. only falls, the natural falls, the dropped DT take out some cliff tanks before killed by arclite fire. Several DT make it into the base but thanks to some sloppy micro the kills useless SCV¡¦s instead of the deadly tanks or ComSat. But they do destroy the starport before the SV can be completed.
Frank: The few remaining goons are taken out by some tanks and the DT quickly fall after a SS. Let¡¦s check the judges score on that attack, the assault gets an eight from the American judge, MMO¡¦s micro gets a three, Mr. X¡¦s micro gets a five, Mr. X¡¦s defense gets a six, that score was due to the fact that the only detection he had was a comsat station. And the small DT drop by MMO gets a 6 from the Japanese judge.
Joel: Well the attack is over, but the damage is done. Mr. X has lost his min. only expo, and his natural expo, along with several tanks, SCVs, buildings, and his mineral gathering was thrown off.
Frank: MMO better keep the pressure on though, he shouldn¡¦t allow Mr. X to rebuild his defense.
Joel: Looks like Mr. X has re-expanded to natural and it looks like MMO has expanded to not only the 3 o¡¦clock min. only, but the 3 o¡¦clock main.
Frank: But two vultures go up the 3 choke and destroy the probe laying the warp anchor, and are now proceeding to destroy the nexus.
Joel: Vultures destroying a nexus?? HA! I¡¦m taking a nap, wake me in an hour when they get the shields down.
Frank: I wouldn¡¦t fall asleep now, looks like tow zealots are going to have a talk with those vulture drivers.
Joel: The time for talk is past, now is the time for action (I love that quote). Those zeals kill one of the vultures and chase the other down the choke. Right into the waiting arms of several goons.
Frank: Well now MMO has three expos, while Mr. X only has two and a mined out main.
Joel: Looks like MMO is winning the resource war, but let¡¦s see if he can win the fighting war (I don¡¦t know what else to call it).
Frank: Mr. X looks like he¡¦s in trouble, his opponent is not only winning the resource war, but the upgrade war, and unit war. They are both tied as far as macro goes though, each fighter has eight factories/gateways (I just learned today that those / things are called virgules, just another piece of worthless trivia for ya).
Joel: But Mr. X wants to even those resources and mines up his min. only with spider mines, making it look like he will soon expand there.
Joel: Mr. X tries to drop MMO again with another two tanks. But due to the fact that he¡¦s got the map crawling with observers, MMO always seems to know where the dropship is, and where it¡¦s headed.
Frank: Yeah, Mr. X finally decides to land the tanks next to MMO¡¦s newest expansion, but some DT spotted it on the way their. This drop looks short lived as zeals and goons move up the ramp with some maynarded probes.
Joel: Mr. X does indeed expand to his min. only, and he rebuilds his starport for some air support, most likely in the form of SV¡¦s with the already researched EMP upgrade.
Frank: He comes another attack from MMO¡¦s, let¡¦s hope this one has some better micro than before. The armies are Mr. X controlling seven vultures, four tanks currently not in siege mode, and a minefield surrounding the CC. While MMO¡¦s commands ten goons, some observers revealing the mines, and has some zeals and DT hanging back by the temple (they¡¦re probably praying).
Joel: I think this battle will be won by MMO¡¦s, but eventually repulsed by the multiple cliff tanks of Mr. X.
Frank: Well we¡¦ll see if you¡¦re right in a couple seconds. Looks like your wrong Joel, after taking out all but two of the vultures, the goons retreat after taking heavy losses from the tank fire. That attack just didn¡¦t work out.
Joel: But I doubt it will take MMO¡¦s long to rebuild an army, he has quite a lot of resources and eight gateways. And I hear that attack got a 4 from the judge while Mr. X¡¦s defense gets a nine, wow, high score.
Frank: Well it was a good defense. And looks like the German judge is pulling out a seven, but I don¡¦t know why.
Joel: I do, look at the gateways, each one already has a dragoon being made in it, and MMO¡¦s is building another two gates at his main. That¡¦s some damn good macro.
Frank: One of those gates is cancelled at the last second though, looks like MMO¡¦s is changing strategies. Yes, he builds a stargate in its place, quickly followed by two more.
Joel: Meanwhile
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