"Don't macro so much - make more units instead"
-DarkHawke
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| My humiliation is complete | | | Author: | | | IP: | XXXX | | Date: | 09/09/99 09:09 | | Game Type: | Starcraft | | Labels: | none | | Report Rating: , # of Ratings: 3, Max: 5, Min: 4
Lifetime Rating for BloodPressure: 4.3333 |   | First BR, but after you read it, don't bother being kind. I deserve anything I get for this game.
Well, I debated long and hard before writing this. It makes me look like a complete moron (and I certainly was at the time). I had taken about a 6 month break from SC and my skills had deteriorated to newbie status. I don't play games online much because my modem is crap but I do play network games with my friends quite a bit. This particular game was against my computer.
I want to start simple and I pick Terran. So I crank SC up and decide to do a little 1v2 against the computer. Easy, right? Well, I got my clock cleaned so bad it wasn't funny. A fluke, an aberration. I restart and try again. Same result. Again with a great amount of cursing and crying (this is not an effective strat) I am owned. My computer time is not as ample as I would like it to be (any of you who are married will know what I mean) and getting my ass beat by a little gray box and screaming like a bitch is not how I should be spending it.
Now I decide I gotta win or I'll go insane. I start up a FOURTH game. This time 1v1 on Challenger (if you think this is pathetic, just wait) Terran (Me) versus Protoss (my sadistic computer).
Understand that I am flaming mad at this point and want to totally humiliate my computer (see how irrational I was). So I do a completely CHEEZ-EEEEE rush. I know exactly where my opponent is and I send an SCV right outside his base to build a barracks. My first couple marines kill all his probes and pylons.
I know what you're thinking: BOOORING. Here's where the idiocy really starts…
In my total rage, I decide that just killing him is too good. I must NUKE him. So I start climbing the tech tree to nukes. In the mean time, my 5 marines run in once every 2 minutes or so and kill any pylons he has made (I am not proud of this) thus keeping him castrated from a military standpoint.
About the time I start building my Sci-Facility, 4 zealots run out of the woods and kill all my marines while I wasn't looking. They proceed to destroy my only rax outside their base.
Yes, he had snuck a probe off into the jungle and built a pylon and 3 Gates. I had not a single attack unit at this point and had sunk most of my cash into my tech tree. I tried to rebuild, but the stream of zealots kept coming and I was forced to watch as my entire, pathetic, undefended base was ground to dust.
I hung my head in shame, pressed the power button on the computer and went on my deck with a six pack. The computer was not turned on for 3 days (at which point I was told by my still gloating computer that I had not shut it down properly and it was going to run scandisk just to piss me off some more).
I am happy to say that since then my game has improved greatly. I never underestimate any opponent (especially my diabolical computer) and always try to stay calm and give my best game, win or lose.
Obligatory Lessons Learned
1 - My game would benefit from a 75% across the board reduction in suckiness.
2 - It is just a game and is not worth ruining your blood pressure when you lose. Relax, learn from your mistakes and enjoy it.
3 - The computer does not care if you try typing, "You Suck, you fkin cheat ass bitch!!! Rematch!!! I'll own you !!!!."
4 - Never let up when your foe is nearly beaten. Just FINISH HIM as they say in Mortal Kombat.
Thanks for reading and sharing my utter humiliation. Sorry for no pics, but think about it. Would you really want to see this travesty?
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